If, of course, it had been a dream of mine to live and work in NYC. Which it kind of wasn’t. My dream, actually, was to live and work overseas, I never thought it would be NYC. And because I never did it as a gap year, I kinda thought I’d missed my chance. But then A came along, and he can’t stay in one place for long. So here I am, living the dream.
For the last few months I’ve been obsessing over being able to sell myself, being able to articulate clearly what it is I do, what it is I like, being able to state my PURPOSE. I still can’t do it. But I need to be able to, right? I need to be able to meet with new people – recruiters, contacts, friends and tell them who I am, what I do. I need to update my resume, have it sharp and to the point, work my LinkedIn connections. Or who will hire me? No one here knows me.
So I’ve been worrying about how to do this. Worrying that I can’t, that I won’t do it right, or well enough. I’m great at worrying. I’ve been worrying that I have to fit in with THE WAY THINGS ARE DONE or I won’t get a job.
The thing I have learned, by coming halfway across the world, is that the way I operate at home, when I am just being me, works. Of course. I don’t have to be able to articulate my purpose beautifully, be able to sell myself. I still want to work on doing these things, as I reckon they’ll be helpful. But all the worrying about HAVING to? Bollocks. My way works just as well here in NYC as it does in Melbourne. No worrying needed.
So what I am actually reminded of is that I should always trust my gut. Because I usually do what my gut says anyway, whilst all the while worrying that it is wrong.
(All the folks reading this who are rolling their eyes, shaking their fists, supportively thinking “I told you so”, I know who you are. And one day maybe I will believe you).